To add to what @Josh-Cena said, my shortest version of the problem statement is:
I want throw new Error to have as much expressive power as console.log et al.
To be clearer, I don't care about the ability to concatenate raw strings by putting them in subsequent arguments; all I care about are the things that can't be losslessly represented by strings, since those are the things that force me to use the console.error; throw new Error pattern.